This is our third week in a series on emotional safety. We’re looking at the six strategies of Paul Santagata, Head of Industry at Google. Google did a two year study on high-performing teams, and they found that the number one factor in performance was emotional safety. We’re taking these business team strategies and modifying them for our home teams!
Santagata suggests that when you are preparing for a negotiation, to anticipate the likely responses of others. He says this will help you prepare for arguments, but maybe his more interesting point is that he says it will help you see your own argument from the other person’s perspective. If we think about this tip in combination with the tip from week one (finding win-win solutions) we can begin to think about what we know of the needs of others in our home, and start our requests with win-win solutions already in mind.
What do we do when we anticipate the objections of others? The Facilitative Coaching model recommends that in order to speak transparently, we be up front with our predictions of others’ reservations. For example, start a conversation by saying something like, “I want to talk to you about an issue, but I am concerned you might get defensive. Would you be open to hearing what I’m thinking?”
In the end, remember that others may not agree with us. Next week we will talk about listening with curiosity rather than blame so that we can work through difficulties with a learning mindset.
Here is a link to the full article in the Harvard Business Review: